breathe in, breathe out...

2.5 weeks left in Hsinchu.  I have mixed feelings right now.  I'm so grateful for this past year in Taiwan.  Overall this experience has made me much stronger.  I've learned a lot about the world and about myself.  I'll miss my kids and my school. Perhaps I'll one day even miss the crowds, the sounds, and the smells of this city.

As I drove my scooter through afternoon traffic today, I thought back to a few months ago when I was "terrified of navigating out into the masses for fear of running a crowd of pedestrians down."

Most of the things we fear never come true, or at least turn out not as painful as we imagined.

So the question is...why now...after all these small victories, do the fears persist and try to loom into some monster?  Some would say being this anxious, I should just stay in the states, close to family.  But the truth is-  being in Taiwan I'm feeling closer to the healing process than ever before.  Through it all I have felt the hand of God leading me.  I believe I have to turn this completely over to him and trust I'm exactly where he wants me to be.  My Taiwan story isn't over yet.  In some ways I feel it's just begun.